this shit ain’t free, folks

Maintaining Sugarbutch Chronicles has become my part-time job. I spend 10-30 hours on it every week, at least, and I spend many more hours working on it in indirect ways – reading books about sex, watching porn, processing relationships with friends, discussing relationships, listening to podcasts, reading blogs, participating in sex & gender & queer cultural events, going on dates, and hey, even fucking.

All of those things contribute to the work that I do here.

And I feel incredibly blessed that what I do is well received. The daily traffic here continues to grow, and I’m trying to keep up with all the requests, ideas, product reviews, features, articles, and topics, but sometimes I just can’t – I have a dayjob, after all, and friends that I do like to see sometimes – it takes a lot of work to keep this site going.

I’m sure you’ve noticed that I’ve added some actual ads in my sidebar, some web-based merchant affiliates, and, now, a donation button if you feel like becoming a benefactor. I’m also adding some “Sugarbutch Swag” merchandise in the (near!) future.

Here’s some ways you can support this site:

1. Support my advertisers

I don’t get a lot of these coming through, but when I do (upper left sidebar), click through them and look around. Show your support of the folks who choose to advertise here, perhaps they’ll decide it was useful to them and they’ll advertise again.

2. Support my affiliates

If you shop at Eden Fantasys, Babeland, or JT’s Stockroom, consider using the links in my posts or sidebar to access the site. It won’t change anything in your transaction, but a small part of the sales will go to me, and that helps keep this site in business. If you belong to any web-based porn sites like the Crash Pad Series, Good Dyke Porn, or I Feel Myself, consider going through the links in my sidebar as well. I get a few (teeny tiny) kickbacks through renewals and sign-ups, and it supports what I do here.

3. Personal donations

Donors will be rewarded with Sugarbutch swag, custom smut, autographed photos of me (just kidding), a kiss, or lots of gratitude (to be determined at my discretion).

Here’s one way to think of it: I charge more than $50 an hour for my freelance work in writing, web design and web development. So, donating:

$2 pays for a new pen
$12 pays for a new notebook (I go through 1-2 a month)
$25 pays for me to respond to one comment and answer one email
$50 pays for a average-length post that is simply my personal opinion ramblings (one hour)
$100 pays for a full-length post with links and resources, which requires research (two hours)
$200 pays for the hosting costs of this domain for one year
$1000 pays for my time writing, editing, researching, designing, coding, and maintaining this website for one week

Or, if you’d like to think about it another way, you can support my romps through New York City with pretty girls, which inspires my smut writing, which, in turn, gets you off:

$2 buys a pretty girl a daisy
$12 buys a pretty girl some roses
$25 buys drinks for me & a date
$50 buys dinner for me & a date
$100 buys drinks, dinner … and brunch the morning after
$200 buys a night on the town and a trip to the sex store
$1000 buys a weekend getaway to a cabin in the woods where there’s no Internet, only a pretty girl to play with, which will renew my spirits and enable me to manage my full-time job (which pays the bills) in addition to this unpaid part-time job (which I love).

(I can see it now … dating with sponsors! I show up on the date and hand the girl a flower (“this flower was sponsored by”), go to drinks and dinner (“this glass of wine was sponsored by”), give her a good night kiss (“this kiss was paid for by”) … hah! I’m joking, of course. That’s not exactly the kind of sponsorship I’m looking for here.)

Just some ideas … of course I’ll gladly accept donations in any amount. Special benefactors will absolutely be rewarded above and beyond just their access to this site.

Use the donation button in the left sidebar.

4. Merchandise …

… to be announced, but rest assured, it is forthcoming. I’ve had some requests and I think you’ll like what I’m coming up with. I’m going to need some models for the Sugarbutch Swag eventually.

So, that’s it, for now.

I’m very open to suggestions. If you have particular things you want to see here, ideas, requests, input, feedback, I’ll always listen. I won’t promise I’ll take your advice, but hey, I’ll listen. Email me anytime at aspiringstud(at)gmail.com or leave a comment anywhere.

As always, you can subscribe to Sugarbutch in a RSS reader to follow along with my sex, gender, and relationship adventures in the future. That supports me, too.

Published by Sinclair Sexsmith

Sinclair Sexsmith (they/them) is "the best-known butch erotica writer whose kinky, groundbreaking stories have turned on countless queers" (AfterEllen), who "is in all the books, wins all the awards, speaks at all the panels and readings, knows all the stuff, and writes for all the places" (Autostraddle). ​Their short story collection, Sweet & Rough: Queer Kink Erotica, was a 2016 finalist for a Lambda Literary Award, and they are the current editor of the Best Lesbian Erotica series. They identify as a white non-binary butch dominant, a survivor, and an introvert, and they live outside Seattle as an uninvited settler on traditional, ancestral, & unceded Snoqualmie land.

12 thoughts on “this shit ain’t free, folks”

  1. muse says:

    also: $40 buys the two bottles of prosecco and vegan chicken burgers that fuel a Sinclair & Muse evening of processing and gender reveling.

    wow, it would be so great if you could do this for reals. I want to work for Sugarbutch Industries!

    until then I suppose I'll just buy a t-shirt and dream.

  2. Sinclair says:

    oh yes!! I like that one.

  3. linaria says:

    $50 buys dinner for me & a date

    seriously? I guess what they say about NYC inflation is true.

    I wish my time was worth $50/hr. According to my employer, it's only worth about $16.0656/hr.

    In all seriousness, though, I will *totally* buy Sugarbutch swag.

    [Well, $50 is a nice capital-D Date meal, not a quick bite. With drinks or appetizers or dessert (though probably not all three) at a decent place. I actually charge more than $50/hr for my freelance design and writing work, but if I went by what my day job paid, it certainly wouldn't be that much. I'll let you know when the swag is up! – ss]

  4. linaria says:

    Which I should note is twice minimum wage. And I don't get to impress hundreds (thousands?) of people a day with my brilliant mind like Sinclair does. So…yeah.

    [Aw, thanks. – ss]

  5. hmmm, I am having difficulty donating. Paypal keeps asking me to retry but the screen doesn't change. I will try again tonight on my home computer. But there is the slight chance that I might have donated 4 different times, in which case we would have to work out a very special reward. ;)

    Man, dating with sponsors made me laugh hard.

  6. Lacey says:

    Wow…I think your site's cool but the things we love usually aren't free. And many of us aren't making $50 an hour or even $16.

    Perspective, however, is free.

    [I'm not expecting to make $50/hr from this site, but as I'm looking to expand it more & more, I don't have the time I'd like to devote to it because I have to pay the bills. I don't expect anyone to contribute who can't or doesn't want to, but some people can, and want to, and I just am trying to invite that. I don't ever want to make the work I'm doing unavailable because of money, so I'm not making anything exclusive, but I'm trying to expand and take this to the next level, if at all possible!

    Oh, one more thing: my freelance work – where I do charge $50/hr – is not how I primarily make money. I have a 9-to-5 office job making enough to pay bills and take me on dates sometimes, but I am generally not wealthy. The freelance/$50 work is probably an average of 20 hours over six months, and while I would like to pick up more freelance work, I find myself avoiding it to write articles on Sugarbutch instead. I just find myself wondering how much more I could get done if I could devote more focused, uninterrupted, intentional time to Sugarbutch, and what would happen if I quit my day job. The combination of (light!) ads and request for donations is an attempt to see what kind of support is out there, and whether or not I could turn this work into my full-time job. – ss]

  7. Oh I hear ya hon. I probably spend about the same amount of time on my blog too (maybe on the lower side)- and not even turning out as much smart and thought provoking stuff as you. My affiliate links make me enough to pay my electric bill, that's how I've equated it up till now.

    Everything I make this from here on out is going right into my "going back to NY next year fund."

  8. Cookie says:

    I know how you feel. It's so hard to fit everything into a day. The things that you want to do most always end up being the last thing you get to do because you have to be responsible and bring in the money somehow.

    Anyways, I've been reading your blog for a while now and just wanted to let you know that I always enjoy what you have to say and was actually hoping you could give me a little advice. My lady and I are getting married at the end of next year and I'm having an awfully hard time finding a tux to wear. I'm a curvy girl that would like a tux cut for a woman that will fit those curves. Do you know of any queer-friendly places in NYC to buy/have one made? Thanks and keep up the good work!

  9. Essin' Em says:

    I completely understand where you're coming from. I spend tons of time on the blog itself, on comment with other bloggers, networking, reviewing items, etc. And then I spend lots of my non-online time thinking about what I'm going to write, HNT pictures to take, rants to rant, thoughts to think, and what things NOT to post, even though I might want to.

    I don't have any money to donate right now; I barely have enough to get an apartment, since I don't have a job right now, but I wish you the best, and when I do have money, I WILL donate.

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