Tachycardia

Posted on July 24, 2009 in Kristen, poetry | 16 Comments

this is how I want you:

slow. deliberate. measured. languorous. torpid

bordering on excruciating, with kisses that

keep you counting the millimeters between

our mouths (six, four, three), counting

the breaths it takes before my hands

move from waist to shoulders up your

back (five), counting the heartbeats elapsed

to wrap my fingers around your upper arms,

tighten my grip, and press you back against

the wall (124 with occasional tachycardia). you

remember what it feels like to be overtaken,

don’t you, to become supple in my arms, to

struggle until you can do nothing but give over,

become empty for me to fill you everywhere.

because I know that’s what you want, that’s

how you forget yourself, that’s how I forget

myself too, perfect moments of being wrapped

inside you, safe, enveloped, protected, a return

to some place quiet and sacred where the red

burgundy sooths all with muscle and strength.

I will make marks on my wrist so I can measure

how far inside you I can reach, today, tomorrow,

now I can feel the underside of your heart, the

cellar door of it, I will pen the walls with beauty

beauty beauty until it radiates out of your pores,

graffiti seeping from inside. I’ve felt your fingers

thrumming my own atria, those upper chambers

of my heart with their glass doors and misting

humidifiers and weeping plants, I think you know

what it is you cultivate in my chest when your

knees go weak, when you sink your eyes

away from mine and slide back to check if I am

still holding you. I am, I am, my arms never leave

that curve of your shoulders, your hip, the way

you crush against me when I open wide, making

room for every inch of your skin against mine. you

quicken my heartbeats, not something I am used to,

but this means I can be stronger, pump more blood,

stay up even later, fucking and loving till dawn.

16 Comments | Category: Kristen, poetry | Tags: desire, falling in love, heartbeats, love letter, poetry, relationships, ruler tattoo, running with a single word, seduction, ten-line stanzas, this is how I want you, why I write with a thesaurus

A Love Letter to Femmes

Posted on April 1, 2009 in in praise of femmes | 20 Comments

Maria See put the original call out for the Femmethology literally years ago, and ever since I first saw it I knew I wanted to contribute something to this unique anthology on femme identity. But what? I didn’t feel like I could necessarily speak from a place of authority on What Femme Is, there are hundreds – thousands! – of versions of femme, and no matter what I know about femme or how many femmes I’ve interacted with, I am an observer, a witness of femme, I don’t feel like I create it myself.

So what would I write?

I wrote a few pieces, brainstormed, but nothing I really loved. Nothing really got to the heart of what I was trying to say, which was … what? I wasn’t sure.

But it hit me on the very last day the editors were accepting submissions, and I sat down and wrote this Love Letter in one long sentence, and spent the rest of the day editing and polishing. I’m not going to reproduce the text here (you’ll have to buy the book for that) but I will present you, here, with a recording of me reading the love letter that appears in Visible: A Femmethology Volume Two.

Hope you enjoy it.

~~[display_podcast]~~ Sorry, the podcast plugin seems to have broken – you can’t hear the piece in the browser anymore, but you can still download the mp3.

Thanks very much to Audacia Ray for recording and producing this mp3!

In case you missed it, see more information about the Femmethology here.

20 Comments | Category: in praise of femmes | Tags: a little bit of fodder for my internet stalkers, femme, femme identity, gender, I get a little melodramatic toward the end but I really do like how this piece turned out, love letter, mp3, now you can have my voice in your ear whenever you want it, the femmethology, the sound of my own voice, theory, there are a few more recordings of my voice on this site, writing process

Kicking off the Femmethology blog tour!

Posted on April 1, 2009 in giveaways!, in praise of femmes, swag | 33 Comments

I’m honored to kick off the April Femmethology blog tour! There are four important things in this post, it’s kind of a long one – here’s the breakdown so you don’t miss anything.

Information about Visible: A Femmethology, a two-volume set of books which is out now!
A giveaway! Comment to win a copy of the Femmethology!
Information about the Femmethology release party in New York City, Wednesday April 29th
Continue on the April Femmethology blog tour by visiting these other great sites. Visit Ellie Lumpesse tomorrow!

And coming up shortly, I’ll be posting an mp3 of me reading my essay, Love Letter, which is included in the Femmethology Volume Two.

mainfemmecover1

Visible: A Femmethology (March 2009)
www.femmethology.com
Order Volume 1 and order Volume 2 through the fabulous Homofactus Press.

Femme–an identity that has caused controversy, celebration and ridicule–is now the topic of a two-volume set from Homofactus Press and editor Jennifer Clare Burke titled Visible: A Femmethology. Femmethology calls the LGBTQI community on its own prejudice and celebrates the diversity of individual femmes. Award-winning authors, spoken-word artists, and totally new voices come together to challenge conventional ideas of how disability, class, nationality, race, aesthetics, sexual orientation, gender identity and body type intersect with each contributor’s concrete notion of femmedom.

Femmethology giveaway!

Comment on this post with one fabulous thing that you love about femmes and I’ll pick one random winner.

What’ll you win? A copy of Visible: A Femmethology Volume Two, which includes my piece, Love Letter. AND in addition, EITHER a copy of Volume 1 OR any other erotica book my writing is in – such as: Best Lesbian Erotica 2006, 2007, or 2009. Look about halfway down on my “Shop” page or in the sidebar (—->) for the complete list.

The books will be sent to me and I’ll autograph them for you, then send them on.

Winner will be chosen at random tomorrow morning, so you have today to enter by leaving a comment.

Come join us at the book release party in NYC!

Visible: A Femmethology
New York City Release!
April 29th, 7pm
Bluestockings, 172 Allen St. in the Lower East Side

Featuring contributors: Ryn Hodes, Sinclair Sexsmith, Sassafras Lowrey, Cameron Whitley, Leslie Freeman, J.C. Yu, Hadassah Hill, & Miel Rose

Visible: A Femmethology is a two-volume anthology edited by Jennifer Clare Burke and published by Homofactus Press of personal essays from over fifty contributors who explore what it means to be a queer femme. Award winning authors, spoken-word artists, and totally new voices come together to challenge conventional ideas of how disability, class, nationality, race, aesthetics, sexual orientation, gender identity, and body type intersect with each contributor’s concrete notion of femmedom.

Not in New York City? Check the Femmethology events page to see if there’s a release party in your area. They’ll be in Vermont, Vancouver BC, Atlanta, & more!

Follow the rest of the Femmethology April blog tour with these great sites:

4/1. Sugarbutch Chronicles
4/2. Ellie Lumpesse
4/3. Queer-o-mat
4/4. CyDy Blog
4/6. Catalina Loves
4/7. cross-post: The Femme’s Guide and Femme Fagette
4/8. Daphne Gottlieb
4/9. Bilerico Project
4/10. Screaming Lemur: Femme-inism and Other Things
4/13. The Femme Hinterland
4/14. Bochinche Bilingüe: Borderlands Writing and The Vagina Adventures
4/15. Dorothy Surrenders
4/16. Miss Avarice Speaks Her Mind
4/17. The Femme Show
4/19. Sexuality Happens
4/20. Queer Fat Femme
4/21. Sublimefemme Unbound
4/22. Tina-cious.com and Jess I Am (butch-femme couple day!)
4/23. FemmeIsMyGender
4/24. The Lesbian Lifestyle
4/25. Femme Fluff
4/26. Weldable Cookies
4/27. The Verbosery
4/28. A Consuming Desire and Creative Xicana
4/29. Queercents
4/30. en|Gender

And last but not least, visit www.femmethology.com for all sorts of information about the books. Order Volume 1 and order Volume 2 through the fabulous Homofactus Press.