Announcing: The Dom Sessions

I’m doing a new thing!

I’ve been talking about this for years and I’m excited to be actually making it happen. In 2022, through the Patreon, I will be running live conversations with other dominants and folks into D/s specifically about dominance, sadism, leadership, consent, choice, and all those things — hard and wonderful — that come with being on the D-side of the slash.

The conversations will be once a month, on the second Wednesdays at 6pm PT/9pm ET for an hour. They will be recorded and folks who are signed up through the Patreon will get the recordings.

I’ll be asking questions like:

  • How do you relate to and find home (or not) in kink communities?
  • Do you think there’s a shortage of doms & tops?
  • How did you come to understanding your dominance or dominant identity?
  • What’s it like to be a dominant with your particular intersectional identities?
  • Do you have a sense of spirituality in your dominance?
  • Who are your D/s mentors? Who did you learn from when you were coming into dominance, and who are your favorite people to learn from now?
  • What are your favorite D/s resources (books, websites, etc)?

… and many more, too — these are just a few to start. Maybe you’ve got some good questions to ask of some very smart D-type folks? Please share them and leave them in the comments!

I’m still lining up the whole year, but I have many amazing educators already planned, and I can’t wait to share them with you! If you don’t already know their work, you definitely should check out what they’re doing with their podcasts, education, videos, community organizing, and more.

Sign up over on Patreon.com for the $5/webinar level or above and you’ll have access to these every month in 2022.

Here’s a little bit more about why I’m making this series …

I don’t know about you, but in the 20+ months of the COVID pandemic so far, in 2020 and 2021, I have had a very hard time staying in touch with my dominance. I used to lean on my community — events, play parties, conferences, retreats, double dates, cotopping dates — to keep me inspired, to keep me in my dominance headspace, to keep my relationship structure in a community context, and to keep me grounded.

I miss all of those ways we used to connect in person intensely.

I hope the Dom Sessions series can do some of those things: provide inspiration, encourage my D/s headspace, supporting the authority exchange in my relationship. And hopefully, they can do some of that for you, too.

Psst: submissives & switches & other folks who do not identify as dominants are welcome! Though the conversations will be dominant-focused, anyone can attend.

So who will be part of this?

So far, some amazing folks! I will announce the others and update them here as I have them confirmed.

Miss Lola Sunshine

Wednesday, January 12, 6pm PT

Miss Lola Sunshine is a kinky queer high femme who believes in glitter, excellent manners, and cooking with real butter. She loves Disney, Barbie, and Hello Kitty. When she is not at Disneyland, or traveling to Disney parks all over the world, she is a sex and kink educator who has helped host and facilitate play parties and gatherings for adult littles, queer and trans people, and people of color in the Bay Area, which is where she lives, works, and plays with her dog Cupcake, over two dozen mouse ears, and over 50 pairs of shoes.

Marcia B

Wednesday, February 9, 6pm PT

Marcia Baczynski is an internationally recognized expert on sexuality, communication and personal empowerment who works to provide people with practical tools to create extraordinary relationships. Her primary mission is to help people overcome shame and get in touch with what they truly want — romantically, sexually and relationally — even if it’s off the beaten path.

As co-founder of Cuddle Party, Marcia has helped tens of thousands of people to speak up for the kind of touch they want, say No unapologetically, and foster more honest, connected relationships. She is a sought-after coach and presenter who has made hundreds of media appearances across the globe, including Rolling Stone, GQ, People, and Newsweek.

Marcia brings wisdom, humor, and creativity to all aspects of her work, and offers a fresh perspective on love, sex and relationships. When she’s not writing, teaching or traveling, you can find her hiking or camping in the woods, spending time with her family, or on a boat.


Wednesday, March 9, 6pm PT

Trailblazing educator, sexologist, artist, and irritant to banality, Midori founded Rope Dojo and ForteFemme: Women’s Dominance Intensive. She penned the first English instruction book on Shibari titled, “Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage” in 2001, paving the way to the popularity of rope. Dan Savage calls her the “Super Nova of Kink,” while others affectionately call her Auntie Midori for her cool, tell-it-like-it-is, funny, reality-based teaching. 

She is also the author of “Wild Side Sex,” “Master Han’s Daughter,” and “Silk Threads.”
During this pandemic, learn, laugh and enjoy her special online classes, events and art at www.patreon.com/PlanetMidori. Creative Living Coaching and Private Sexological Consultations: ask@planetmidori.com. Links: Instagram: PlanetMidori | Facebook: MidoriReallyMidori | FetLife: Midori | Twitter: @PlanetMidori

Daemonum X

Wednesday, April 13, 6pm PT

Daemonum X is a femme leatherdyke and lifestyle Dominant. She is a polyamory and BDSM coach offering strategies for successful relationships. She is the founder and Editrix of FIST, an anthology zine for leatherdykes, as well as Linked, A Polyamory Zine. More of her words on BDSM and power exchange can be found in Them, Autostraddle, and Wussy Mag. Daemonum X lives in Brooklyn with her two dogs.

You can follow her on social media @daemonumX, subscribe to her newsletter, and buy zines at fistzine.com.

Teagan The Bootblack

Wednesday, May 11, 6pm PT

Teagan fell in love with bootblacking at a young age, doing her shoes before church. Although these days her skills are being put to more salacious uses, she still identifies as a spiritual bootblack. For her, bootblacking harkens back to the foot-washing ritual. Teagan is International Ms Bootblack 2018, and the 20th person to hold that title. She is based in Oakland, CA. During her title year she invited our community to “Take Refuge” in the capable hands of our bootblacks. She’s the executive producer of the San Francisco Bootblack Contest.

Sir Damien

Wednesday, June 8, 6pm PT

Sir Damien is a queer, trans, Dominant, who has been a part of the leather community since 2012. He is the co-Head of House of Maison de Meson with Mademoiselle Ceci. He is passionate about bringing leather and kink education to the BIPOC community as well as creating intentional space for BIPOC in the leather community. To this end, Sir Damien has hosted hospitality suites, sat on panels and taught classes around the country. Since 2019, he has taken pride in making it his part-time job to aid and support IMsLBB as the Technical Producer.

Sir Damien is the Sergeant at Arms for ONYX NW, sits on the Board of Directors for the NCSF and for POCKLE, and is the co-founder of the Seattle Annex of the Carter Johnson Leather Library. He finds the time to further serve the leather and kink community as a mentor, educator and advocate for BIPOC and transgender kinksters. In addition to his leather journey, Sir Damien has a Masters degree in Computer Science, is an avid reader and has earned multiple patents for his engineering work in aviation.

Liquid Onyx

Wednesday, July 10, 6pm PT

Liquid (She/They/Them/That Bitch) is a Black Femme Presenting Gender Fluid, Queer, Social Worker, Educator, Published Model, and Sex Worker who has been a fixture in the BDSM/Leather community for 25 years. An accomplished competitor in her field, Liquid is no stranger to the stage. She has competed in and won Ms. Henrietta Hudson Fetish 2008 & 2009 and went on to become the only Woman & Black/POC to compete in the first Mr/Ms New York City Leather contest. She has modeled and volunteered in the community at events like Leather Pride Night, GMSMA, and Folsom Street East. She has presented for TES’ DW/sm group, was a panelist on LSM Presents Woman’s Herstory, and has raised money for various charities in and outside of NYC. Liquid was the first person and first woman of color to grace the cover of TESFest’s Prometheus Magazine two years in a row. Liquid held the title of the Northeast Leather Person 2020 & 2021. Liquid was also named one of GO Magazine’s 2021 “100 Women We Love.” Currently Liquid is a member of the Seattle Pacific North West Onyx Pearls, and member of the Lesbian Sex Mafia (LSM). Liquid continues to use her platform and many positions to educate, empower, and amplify voices of other Sex Workers, BIPOC LGBTQIA+ GNC/NB folx in and outside of the BDSM/Leather community.

Anton Fulmen

Wednesday, August 10, 6pm PT

Anton is the author of The Heart of Dominance and The Dominance Playbook, a kink and sexuality educator, and has had a lifelong passion for intimate authority and control. Find all his kink education work at www.ConsensualDominance.com.

Jill Carter

Wednesday, September 14, 4pm PT / 7pm ET

PLEASE NOTE: 4pm Pacific / 7pm Eastern start time!
Jill Carter, IMsL 1996, has been active in the leather lifestyle for over 40 years. In 1996, she became the tenth International Ms Leather and the first African American woman to win the title. Her platform during her title year was “Saving our Leather History” and she mobilized the community with her “Each One Teach One” slogan. Everywhere she traveled she asked, and communities responded, donating both money and memorabilia to the Leather Archives. Her “Just Give Me One Dollar” speeches around the country raised awareness and funds for the then very young organization. At International Mr. Leather 1998, her speech raised enough money to pay the deposit for the building that now houses the LA&M.

Jill was the driving force behind the formation and development of the Ms. and Mr. World Leather Event, which introduced many unique contest elements that are incorporated in leather contests today. She has served on the Production Board of ABW and International Mr. Drummer and was the first woman of color to serve as an IML judge. She was the visionary behind the Unsung Heroes Award, recognizing individual who serves the community relentlessly, quietly from behind the scenes and are seldom noticed, but are integral to the community. She was the visionary behind A Leather Day of Caring, when leather community from around the world came together to display acts of kindness and caring to any and all. Vi and her have maintained their commitment to their Leather Daddies who instructed them in 1975 to carry on in their absence to carry on the “Each One; Teach One”, that still echoes throughout our community today.

She has been an officer or founding member of various organizations across the United States, and a speaker or workshop presenter for leather organizations and colleges and her book, “So You Wanna Be a Title Holder.” is considered a contestant *must read*. Jill is the recipient of the Pantheon of Leather Woman of the Year Award 1998 and 2001; Reader’s Choice Woman of the Year 1998; one-third of the Couple of the Year Award and the Mr. Marcus Hernandez Lifetime Achievement Award; The National Leather Association International Order of Merit and Lifetime Achievement Awards; the Emerald Award from the state of Washington and numerous other awards.

The Carter-Johnson Leather Library is the largest privately owned repository of the BDSM, Kink, Leather and Sexual Histories dating as far back as the 1700’s that they have collected and preserved for generations to come and they have no qualms about sharing their collection with the community.


Wednesday, October 26, 10am PT

Please note: different day & time!
Caritia’s fascination with the root/the body stems from a longing to deeply ‘listen’ to the (her) body holistically, from the inside out. Self-identifying and living in a queer, gender-fluid, BiPoC (afab) body, connecting with the LGBTQIA+ spectrum, as a sex worker and dominant, who is nd with dyslexia, whose art, education and consulting pursuits stem from a desire to advocate and support others to explore intentionally and intersectionally the boundaries around their bodies, sexuality and self-expression, using the key practices and language of kink alongside the 20+ years of lived personal & professional experiences. Caritia is a forever student of nuanced layers of being human.

The Black Queer Dominant

Wednesday, November 9, 6pm PT

A #sensualdominant exploring the edges of desire, intimacy & freedom for Black Queer Folx. instagram.com/blackqueerdom

Mademoiselle Ceci

Wednesday, December 14, 6pm PT

Mademoiselle Ceci (she/her) is a Sadistic Afro-Indigenous Dominant Alpha Femme chasing life, philosophy, and adventure. She has been on various portions of her Leather journey for the past 17+ years, doing so more publicly since she began coming to the US in 2008. Education, history, hedonism and serving her various communities are her passions. When not caring for, and indulging in, her Family, Ceci spends her time serving as a griot at the Carter-Johnson Library and Collection, Vice President of POCKLE, Founder and Sergeant-at-Arms of the Seattle/PNW chapter of the Onyx Pearls and Executive Producer of IMsLBB. A playful Sadist at heart, Mademoiselle Ceci revels in the pain of others while maintaining a wicked giggle and an evil grin. A matriarch by nature, Mademoiselle Ceci takes great pride in loving and caring for those in her charge as co-Head-of-Household with Sir Damien at the Maison de Meson.

Can’t wait to share these conversations with you, and hear all your amazing questions about dominance and D/s, too. Hope you’ll join me.

Sign up over on Patreon.com for the $5/webinar level or above and you’ll have access to these every month in 2022.

Published by Sinclair Sexsmith

Sinclair Sexsmith (they/them) is "the best-known butch erotica writer whose kinky, groundbreaking stories have turned on countless queers" (AfterEllen), who "is in all the books, wins all the awards, speaks at all the panels and readings, knows all the stuff, and writes for all the places" (Autostraddle). ​Their short story collection, Sweet & Rough: Queer Kink Erotica, was a 2016 finalist for a Lambda Literary Award, and they are the current editor of the Best Lesbian Erotica series. They identify as a white non-binary butch dominant, a survivor, and an introvert, and they live outside Seattle as an uninvited settler on traditional, ancestral, & unceded Snoqualmie land.

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