miscellany

Me + Jiz Lee + Nenna Joiner at Smith College

Jiz Lee, Nenna Joiner, & me at Smith College last week

Thanks Adrienne for the photo (which I found on Tumblr)

So … Smith College was kind of an epic visit. It was snowing when I got there, which I just love, aside from that I’d brought my best leather city loafters and leather jacket and did not dress for it at all. Note to self: check the weather before traveling. Bird reminded me that the last time I was there, it was so hot that I couldn’t wear the sweater/button down/tie combo that I brought, so I ended up teaching in my tee shirt.

I was there for almost three days, and made some great friends in the Peer Sex Educator group who brought me. They swiped me into the dining halls for meals, brought me to a few of their classes (Women’s Sexuality and Black Queer Theory … both amazing!), invited me to a guitar sing-along circle (seriously y’all have got to learn Closer to Fine), took me out for drinks after, and generally showed me a good time. It was really fun to be able to have some actual time to hang with the students this time, since quite often I just show up at a college, do my workshop, and leave. It was really fun to pick their brains with questions like, what’s your relationship to your gender? How’s your sex life? What keeps you up at night? How has your gender evolved? I find it fascinating to hear those stories, and sometimes I offered my own perspectives, but most of the time I just try to listen.

I’m so grateful to be home for most of March. I’ll be at Rutgers for a sex & relationship conference, and at the Rainbow Book Fair here in NYC, then at International Ms. Leather in San Francisco at the end of the month, but for the most part I am looking forward to the next few weeks actually at home and inside a routine. My dad is even going to be in town! I’m looking forward to that, he’s a bit of a jokester and lots of fun. After that … well, April and May are probably going to be nuts. The book is due April 10th (omg the book! The book!!) and I’m headed to Boston, Seattle, Portland, and probably a few other places in those months. This is the busiest spring travel schedule I’ve ever had, so I’m not really sure how I’m going to deal with it and keep up with my own self-care, but I’m going to try.

I’m going to try to keep up with my writing, too, but as you can see, it’s a challenge. I used to think I could get writing done while I travel, but I think I am kind of giving up on that dream. I am so grateful for this patchwork freelance life I am putting together, but like any other life, it has it’s challenges.

I’m still booking for April and May, I still have some free time! I’d love to come visit your city, your college, your local community center, your sex toy store, if you feel inspired to bring me. I hope I can still get to Chicago and Durham, particularly. Get in touch with me if you want to start chatting about that!

Published by Sinclair Sexsmith

Sinclair Sexsmith (they/them) is "the best-known butch erotica writer whose kinky, groundbreaking stories have turned on countless queers" (AfterEllen), who "is in all the books, wins all the awards, speaks at all the panels and readings, knows all the stuff, and writes for all the places" (Autostraddle). ​Their short story collection, Sweet & Rough: Queer Kink Erotica, was a 2016 finalist for a Lambda Literary Award, and they are the current editor of the Best Lesbian Erotica series. They identify as a white non-binary butch dominant, a survivor, and an introvert, and they live outside Seattle as an uninvited settler on traditional, ancestral, & unceded Snoqualmie land.

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