journal entries

how suave I really am

“You could come to my house. I have a dress you could borrow for work tomorrow.”

“Uh, I appreciate that, but, ya know, I think your clothes would be too small for me.”


“We really need a teleporter. We could go to my place, get my clothes, go back to your place …”

“And get your cock.”

“Oh, I have that on me.” I’d been packing all night.

“You do?!” She grabbed my fly for proof.

“Yeah. You know my motto – I’d rather have a cock and not need it, than need it and not have it.

“Dammit, what were we doing? Now I feel like the whole night’s been wasted.”

“You didn’t want to talk identity politics and buddhist philosophy and BDSM theory? I knew it, you’re just using me for my socks.”


“I mean sex. Cocks! Fuck.”

Penny laughed. “I’m going to have to start writing for Sugarbutch to show how suave you really are.”

Published by Sinclair Sexsmith

Sinclair Sexsmith (they/them) is "the best-known butch erotica writer whose kinky, groundbreaking stories have turned on countless queers" (AfterEllen), who "is in all the books, wins all the awards, speaks at all the panels and readings, knows all the stuff, and writes for all the places" (Autostraddle). ​Their short story collection, Sweet & Rough: Queer Kink Erotica, was a 2016 finalist for a Lambda Literary Award, and they are the current editor of the Best Lesbian Erotica series. They identify as a white non-binary butch dominant, a survivor, and an introvert, and they live outside Seattle as an uninvited settler on traditional, ancestral, & unceded Snoqualmie land.

7 thoughts on “how suave I really am”

  1. Eileen says:

    Hilarious. Thanks for that :).

  2. greg says:

    This made me laugh and laughter is sexy to me so there! Still sexy, even without the suave. ;)

  3. leo says:

    hey, at least it wasn't a scock…

  4. Desde says:

    LOL! smoooooooooooooooth. :)

  5. muse says:

    oh, you're suave all right. and I know for a fact you have great taste in … socks.

  6. Essin' Em says:

    Tres amusing.

    Hey, suave gentleman that you are, I bet you could tell me the right way to fold a bandanna for flagging…because I'm having a horrible time of it!

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