Tag: ways to stalk me

August is Heat Wave / Erotica at Sideshow

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Don’t forget! Just one week from today, Sideshow in New York City will feature a lovely erotica night.

Sideshow: The Queer Literary Carnival
Hosted by Cheryl B. & Sinclair Sexsmith
August 10 @ The Phoenix, 447 East 13th Street @ Avenue A
East Village, New York City
Doors, 7:30pm. Reading, 8pm.
Free! But we’ll pass the hat for donations to the readers
@sideshowseries
RSVP on Facebook!

August’s theme is HEAT WAVE EROTICA, starring:
Tamiko Beyer (Drunken Boat)
Rachel Kramer Bussel (In The Flesh)
Mildred Dred Gerestant (OUTMusic Spirit Award)
Kit Yan (Mr. Transman 2010)
… Read more about the readers.

Sober Stories at Queer Memoir 7/24

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My Sideshow co-host and co-producer Cheryl B. is guest curating for another New York City queer literary reading series, Queer Memoir. Queer Memoir is a bit different than Sideshow (or In the Flesh or Red Umbrella Diaries or Drunken! Careening! Writers! or the Bluestockings Poetry Jam & Open Mic) as it features people who are not necessarily performers or professional storytellers sharing their lives and stories.

Cheryl’s guest theme is Sober, and it happens this Saturday, the 24th of July at the Queers for Economic Justice performance space in Manhattan. Come! I’m going to do my best to make it, and then likely go to Butch Burlesque at Dixon Place later that same night.

Guest curator and host Cheryl B. presents the sober-themed edition of NYC’s premier queer storysharing show, Queer Memoir, starring: Joshua Bastian Cole, Cora Leighton, Katie Liederman, Melissa Febos, Sophia Pazos, Terence, & Tina Goerlach

Queer Memoir: Sober
July 24, 8pm
QEJ Perormance Space
147 West 24th Street, 4th floor
$5 suggested donation (no one turned away)
http://queermemoir.com
Facebook Invite

About the storytellers … 

Classes in Portland, OR in Late July

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I’ll be heading to the lovely City of Roses in late July, and I’ll be teaching two different classes on July 21st & 22nd at She Bop and Fascinations sex toy stores.

Gender & Role Play
Wednesday, July 21st, 2010, 7:30pm
She Bop
909 N. Beech St, Portland, OR
SheBoptheShop.com

Join Sinclair Sexsmith for this workshop focusing on the ways that playing with gender in role play can be liberating for our gender expressions or identities outside of role play too. This class will include Sinclair’s basic gender tenets & philosophies, how to play with gender in role play, how play can deepen understandings of our own personal gender presentations, expressions, & identities, and also some details for playing with masculinity & femininity.

Strap-On 101
Thursday, July 22nd, 2010
Fascinations
9515 SE 82nd Ave, Portland, OR

Interested in strapping on a cock? Not sure where to start? Come to this interactive workshop with Sinclair Sexsmith, experienced strap-on aficionado, for tips and suggestions on what kinds of dildos and harnesses will be right for you, and how to strap it on with gusto. We’ll talk about how cocks can be played with and experienced by every gender, and how to have more cock confidence.

As usual, check out my Appearances page at mrsexsmith.com to keep up with where I’m going to be and what I’m teaching.

And hey, college students, high school seniors, and other folks who are returning to your college in the fall and may take part in student organizations such as the queer clubs, sex clubs, or feminist clubs: Want to bring me to your campus to speak this fall? I’m planning some travel dates now, and they’ll be solidified in August and September when school is back in session. Please get in touch with me or my booking company, PhinLi Bookings, to see when I can come do one of my workshops at your school.

KinkForAll in Providence, RI!

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First of all:

I totally admit to having stolen all of this text (below) about KinkForAll from Jack at Writing Dirty (keep refreshing until you get to the kneesocks header image, yum), though I presume it originated at the KinkForAll wiki, collectively written by the participants. Kristen and I are heading up to KinkForAll Providence this Saturday, February 6th, and I am extra looking forward to that gathering. If you haven’t been to a KinkForAll yet, you’re missing out—to be honest I’ve only been to one, the first in New York City, but I went away with many many ideas and had a wonderful time chatting with folks. Very much looking forward to attending again!

Second of all:

I am EXTRA excited to head to Providence to congratulate Megan Andelloux on the recent accomplishment, opening up the Center for Sexual Pleasure & Health. I’m not going to go into the details of how and why it was first denied the right to open, then finally permitted, but there are some articles over on Carnal Nation if you’d like to see what major work Megan has done to get an educational center in Pawtucket, Rhode Island. Kristen lived up near there for quite a few years, and has experienced first-hand what the repression of the supposedly “open-minded” New Englander culture can be like, so she’s excited to check it out, too. I’m secretly hoping that KinkForAll will evolve into a party celebrating the CSPH. Or that Megan will take me up on that slot on her dance card that I once had my name on.

Third of all:

Sorry to have yet another post about an in-person event, rather than some article on gender or story on sex or erotica piece or any type of “real” content. I’m freakin’ busy! (I’m also doing a workshop at the Lesbian Sex Mafia on February 19th, and just launched a new weekly column called Mr. Sexsmith’s Other Girlfriend on Sex Is.) Real content in progress, and to come, as always, I promise.

Fourth of all:

Oh yeah, I might do a little workshop on gender at KinkForAll. Or maybe about something else. If you’re coming (or even if you’re not), what would YOU like to see me speak about for 20 minutes?

And now, the real point of the post: all the information you could possibly need about this weekend’s KinkForAll.

—

KinkForAll is an ad-hoc educational unconference about the convergence of sexuality with the rest of life for anyone and everyone. It is 100% free and open to the public. Anyone with the desire to learn or with something to contribute is welcome and invited to participate.

Vitals
What: A free and highly social day of sexuality education and discussion.
Why: To inspire a creative, interactive and open environment where everyone feels comfortable talking and learning about all things that sexuality relates to in their lives.
When: February 6th, 2010 at 10:00 AM
Where: Brown University, Wilson Hall, Main Green in Providence, Rhode Island
Who: Everyone
How much: FREE (as in beer as well as freedom)

Details
KinkForAll is an ad-hoc gathering born from the desire for people of all persuasions to share and learn in an open environment. It is a fast-paced event with discussions, presentations, and interaction from all participants. (It is inspired by the BarCamp community.)

ANYONE WITH SOMETHING TO CONTRIBUTE OR WITH THE DESIRE TO LEARN IS WELCOME AND INVITED TO JOIN. When you attend, be prepared to share with others. When you leave, be prepared to share it with the world.

A KinkForAll is a special kind of gathering because there are no spectators, only participants. Attendees must give a talk or a presentation, help with one, or otherwise contribute in some way to support the event. This is called sharing and we like it. All presentations are scheduled the day they happen—there are no pre-scheduled presentations or keynote addresses. The people present at the event will select the presentations they want to see.

Anyone can lead a session, on any topic related to sexuality. You do not necessarily have to teach a new skill or idea. You might share an experience, facilitate a discussion, or read a poem. The goal is to start a conversation, make connections (and maybe even friends), and exchange knowledge. Presentations promoting specific commercial products or companies are discouraged.

Learn more about what to expect at wiki.kinkforall.org/WhatToExpect

Learn more about the event guidelines at wiki.kinkforall.org/TheRulesOfKinkForAll

This activity is not sponsored by, associated with, or endorsed by Montgomery County Public Schools or Montgomery County Government.

Get Involved
We need your help in spreading the word. Please help by participating.

Here’s how:
1. Get excited by reading fellow participants’ topic ideas on wiki.kinkforall.org/KinkForAllProvidence
2. Add your name or handle to the list of participants
3. Join the mailing list and introduce yourself by emailing [email protected]
4. Show up!

Still have questions? Read the Frequently Asked Questions at wiki.kinkforall.org/FrequentlyAskedQuestions

or email [email protected] for more details.

KinkForAll Online
Participate online before the event at your favorite social networking web site:

Homepage: wiki.KinkForAll.org
Google: groups.google.com/group/kinkforall
Twitter: twitter.com/KinkForAll
Identica: identi.ca/kinkforall
Facebook: www.facebook.com/pages/KinkForAll
Fetlife: fetlife.com/groups/2962

All organizational efforts are coordinated in public via the mailing list. Join for free and help turn ideas into realities!

groups.google.com/group/kinkforall

Want to write some smut with me?

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This just in! Stop the presses! Last minute announcement of how to stalk me this week …

As if I haven’t had enough events this week and last: I was in Northwest Illinois visiting the fine folks at the Students For Sex Against Sexism in Society club at Knox College doing my Fucking with Gender workshop this past weekend, last night I was at Columbia’s Conversio Virium talking to a whole bunch of kinksters about Gendering Power: How to Spice Up Your Role Play, and on Friday I’ll be at Swarthmore College outside of Philadelphia for the Trans Day of Remembrance.

And now, I’ll be at The Eulenspiegel Society‘s Queer SIG (special interest group) in New York City this Thursday.

Here’s the details:

Thursday, November 19, TES Queer SIG Presents: PIY: Porn It Yourself
Nayland Blake on photography, Blaise on filmed pornography, Sinclair Sexsmith on written smut

Mainstream porn often just doesn’t cut it when you’re kinky and queer, and that’s why there’s been a long history of people making their own. Join the queer SIG for three half-hour workshops on the pleasures and pitfalls of different kinds of porn production and publishing: filmic, written and photographic and pick up tips on how to represent the sex that’s hot for you.

Members $4; Non-Members $8 Joria Studios, 260 W 36th, 3rd Floor Doors open at 7:30 pm. Meeting starts at 8 pm.

It’ll be three different half-hour segments, one on film, one on photography, and one on written smut, with lots of tips about doing it yourself. I’m excited to see both the photography and the film segments, since I do have that nice little Flip video camera that is just begging to be used, and since Kristen is getting a bit more comfortable in front of a camera … in fact, I just ordered a pinup book to play with, and we were just looking at the Pinup Finishing School‘s pin up and hair workshops.

Want to book me for an event? Check out my profile at Phin Li Bookings, or contact me directly:

“Whoops! Where’d my job go?”

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Followers of my @mrsexsmith Twitter account will know that my 9-to-5 day job is pretty much over. I’ve worked as a graphic designer at a firm in midtown for nearly the last four years, and they spun off two of the three divisions of the company, which were the two I worked for, and now I am technically on leave through December 1st. That means if they call me I have to go in, but I can’t accept another job until December 1st. Meanwhile, I have some t i m e o f f.

The million dollar question is, of course, what are you going to do now? Well, I’m not quite sure. I’ll be doing freelance graphic design and writing for a while, and building up my own artistic career. I will be looking for another job, but I’d like to have some down time before I begin a serious search, and I think I can live on a lot less than I thought was necessary.

I’m also hoping to make some appearances and do some workshops – so far I am scheduled on October 16th, Friday, at Bluestockings Bookstore, speaking on a panel about Feminist Sex, and also on November 16th at Conversio Virium, Columbia University’s BDSM student group, where I’ll be giving a lecture on Gendering Power: How to spice up your role play.

I’d love to do a bit of traveling to colleges nearby, too – Smith, Bard, back to my alma mater the University of Washington. I’m hoping that some of those gigs will work out, my booking company Phin Li has been helping me with my scheduling, and if you’d like to book a date with me, you can contact me at my regular email address or Phin Li at bookings at phinli.com.

(Also, Jesse James is coming to visit, and we are so going to paint the town. Can’t wait. She hasn’t met Kristen yet and it’s going to be a blast.)

I’ve noticed that July and August were two of the quietest months I’ve ever had here on Sugarbutch, for some reasons I’ve already explained, and because work changed their corporate access policies which meant that I couldn’t access this site from there.

I will be going back to the minimum of one-time-a-day five-days-a-week posting on Sugarbutch that I used to do, for a while, while I’m in this transition. I have about twenty topics I need to write on, and half a dozen drafts. If you have topical requests, now’s the time to chime in. And as always, if you have specific questions for me, I’ll be glad to address them as well as I can. I try hard to keep up with my inbox.

The ending of this job is a huge transition. It was absolutely time for this job to end, and it has worked so well for me – really, this job has been the major funding behind Sugarbutch for the last 3.5 years, since I started this site shortly after I got that job and I spent many hours working on Sugarbutch from that position. (Why else do you think my Sugarbutch Star chapbook is by “On Company Time” productions?) I basically got out of debt through this job, and I saved up quite a bit in my 401K, and it has afforded me to get on my feet in New York City in a way that seemed impossible a few years ago. I had been planning to leave this job in the beginning of next year regardless, and the way that this position was eliminated was probably the best possible way to lose a job. Still, it’s a huge change … I’ve commuted to Midtown Manhattan every weekday for nearly four years! I’ve had full access to all sorts of beautiful paper and color printers and supplies! I know my way around that neighborhood so well, in fact, that I don’t know where to get many things in my neighborhood near my house, since I knew I could just pick whatever it was up during my work week.

Meanwhile, though, I’ve had some amazing conversations with Audacia Ray about the future of the Sugarbutch Empire, and where I’m going, and how best to use my time with my artistic career. And I finally, finally, will have a good amount of time to get some of my shit in order and really meditate on where I’m going.

New Email Address

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Hey, everybody! Listen up, ’cause I don’t want to say this over & over. I have a new email address: mr.sexsmith(at)gmail.com. Please update your email address books accordingly!

You know how on some blogs, they have their gmail address displayed as an image (that appears to be google-generated, with the google colors) so as to divert spammers? I would like to do that here, but I can’t figure out where it comes from, and I can’t find a blog as an example or I’d ask them. I just know I’ve run into it in my surfings. If you know what I’m talking about, will you get in touch? Merci.

Reading on Monday 6/8 in NYC – Carol’s in town!

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I’ll be doing a reading – by which I mean, I’ll be reading, in person, some smut that I wrote – this coming Monday, and ohmygod I’ve never been in such better company. Seriously, wait till you see this lineup. You know how sometimes you do an event or a gig or throw a party and it’s just the best that it could possibly ever be, and you don’t know how it’ll ever get better than this.

Carol Queen is in town (!!!) and organized this reading – if you haven’t actually read her smutty queer novel The Leather Daddy and the Femme, just want to give a quick plug for it – it’s some of the most queer sex I’ve ever read, though most of it features a crossdressing dyke and a leather daddy gay boy. It is very much worth the read. (Browse through more smut & erotica that I recommend over in the Sugarbutch Amazon A-store.)

I haven’t decided what to read yet, but it’ll be very dirty. Any requests?

I hear there will be Sex Blogger Calendars we’ll be giving away, too. Come get yours signed by some of the pinups, myself included; come have a drink, come chit-chat with some of the most fascinating folks studying and writing about sexuality.

What: A Sex-Positive Soiree and Reading

Who: Carol Queen visits from San Francisco, joined by Rachel Kramer Bussel, Elizabeth Wood, Audacia Ray, and Sinclair Sexsmith!

When: Monday, June 8, 6-9 pm (reading will start between 7:30-8, last about an hour).

Why: Carol Queen’s coming through town and wants to collaborate with her friends Rachel and Elizabeth to make a space for connecting, schmoozing, touching base, and furthering plans for sex-positive world domination! Her SF nonprofit The Center for Sex & Culture has hosted Rachel Kramer Bussel, worked with Elizabeth Wood on her online community Sex in the Public Square, and has plans to expand its educational and cultural offerings online as soon as we can (if we can’t afford NY real estate, at least we can visit you via your computers). Come mingle with your fellow NY sex people and meet some new ones, then enjoy a reading that will surely be more salaciously smart/sexy brain candy than most people ever get on a Monday (and in some cases, sadly, EVER).

Cosponsored by the hotties at the NYC Sex Bloggers Calendar (www.sexbloggercalendar.com to benefit www.sexworkawareness.org). Free calendars! Signed! (The theme for the 2010 calendar, in production now, is sexual freedom — yay NYC Sex Bloggers!)

Open to everyone 21+ — please pass it on.

Where: Happy Ending, 302 Broome Street, NYC

How much: No charge, but we have a bar guarantee to meet, so have a drink, and donations will be gratefully accepted for the Center for Sex & Culture — no amount to big or too small, and tax-deductible!

More details …

F*cking with Gender: a workshop in Chicago

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I’ll be in Chicago next week on Tuesday night for a workshop with Northwestern University. If you’d like to join this lively discussion, the Rainbow Alliance is kindly opening this up to the public. Come say hi!

F*cking with Gender: Gender expression, identities, labels, transcending the mutually exclusive binaries, queer culture, and hot sweaty sex.

Join Sinclair Sexsmith in this interactive workshop about gender, sexuality, and sex. We’ll play with concepts of how gender identity and sexual identity intersect, butch/femme roles as a language of desire, how labels can be restrictive or liberating, whether gender is a fetish or a kink, and how to have more dirty queer sex. Mr. Sexsmith writes the 2008 #1 sexblog Sugarbutch Chronicles: The Sex, Gender, and Relationship Adventures of a Kinky Queer Butch Top, at www.sugarbutch.net.

May 19th, Tuesday, 7:30PM

Space is limited, please RSVP through Jessie, Princess of Vibe for the Rainbow Alliance at Northwestern University in Chicago (jessicapkaiser[AT]gmail.com)

sinclair1