I ran across this on Queers United a while back, and it’s stuck with me. (There’s an approximate transcript in the comments on that QU post, if you need that.)
Published by Sinclair Sexsmith
Sinclair Sexsmith (they/them) is a queer trans butch writer focusing on sexualities, genders, kink, and relationships. Their short story collection, Sweet & Rough: Queer Kink Erotica, was a 2016 finalist for a Lambda Literary Award, and they are the editor of 5 editions of Best Lesbian Erotica. Their latest book is Your Year in Kink: A Workbook to Reflect, Plan, & Create Your Kink Life. They lead the online erotica writing group, Writing Spicy, annually.
View all posts by Sinclair Sexsmith →
You might also like
Theo Reads Presents: Writing Spicy Showcase 2024 [Video]
August 22, 2025
[Video] Sugar & Spice: Spicy Queer Kink Erotica Showcase
January 16, 2024
[Video] Spicy Showcase at Drunken! Careening! Writers!
January 16, 2024

Pretty powerful stuff Sin, thanks for sharing. I've been MIA for a while, I see i've got a lot of catching up to do around here:)
I've heard a number of different versions of this type of exercise – another one asks people to imagine the many types of harassment they'd experience if they were gay. But I have mixed feeling about them. It's good for straight people to think about, but too often queer-positive educators use such exercise on a mixed group. That's especially rough if, when you're doing these exercises designed to elicit sympathy about how miserable it is to be gay, some members of your group are queer. High school and middle school kids who are trying to figure out their own sexuality can end up convinced that being gay is a totally miserable fate to be avoided at all costs, and get that idea reinforced by exercises that are supposed to be making their lives easier. Since avoiding that is basically impossible, I wish educators would make sure that their pictures of what being queer is like include all the really awesome (and normal/ok) things about queerness too.
thanks so much for posting this; i'd been looking for it for the last week or so after finding the broken link on many other blogs too.