How do I love Babeland … let me count the ways.

Well, so first, they asked me if I’d like to review the Papillion vibrator. And of course I said sure, I’d probably review a paper cup for Babeland if they asked me to, and I’ve been looking for a small-but-powerful vibe when I don’t want to power up the Hitachi. The Papillion is a little girly in some ways … the butterfly is not exactly my style, but they don’t really make butch vibrators. But hey, if it works well, it doesn’t matter so much what’s painted on it.

Turns out, part of the proceeds from this sweet vibe goes directly to the Living Beyond Breast Cancer organization, which is pretty darn cool. I didn’t get a cute little butterfly vibe to review, but instead, the fine folks at Babeland sent me a few other treasures - and both in black! Much more butch, I appreciate that.

First, the Laya Spot vibrator. It’s small, cute, discreet, easy to control, pretty powerful. It’s got three different “buzz patterns,” gentle pulses of vibration that are pretty fun to play with. Still not as powerful as the almighty Grandmother of vibrators, the Hitachi (you have one of those, right? It’s up there with the bunny as Toys That Should Be In Every Toy Box). It’s kind of an upgrade to the Silver Bullet - better looking, much more suave, better vibration power, better grip. It’s like the Silver Bullet’s suave older brother who has his own car and comes home from college on the weekends with a different blonde and his laundry. Still needs something else to really get the job done, but it’s a great start, and coupled with a few other goodies - like jacking off with the Share - mmmhoney yes.

Okay, so. The Share double dildo. I reviewed Feeldoe’s version of this dildo recently and wasn’t particularly impressed, but the Share has subtly altered a few things that make a big difference.

The material is much nicer, for one. The Share is silicone, as is the Feeldoe, but the Share is a kind of matte finish which is silky and lovely, where the Feeldoe feels like slick plastic (not so sexy).

I’m pretty particular about how I want to have control of a cock with which I fuck, so controlling a double without a harness was very difficult. The internal part of the Share - the one that goes inside of me - is thicker than on the Feeldoe, and differently shaped such that it stays in much easier. I still have to exercise my kegels a bit, but I can tell that I have a much easier, better grip on it, which - hopefully - will mean that my precision will be better with this one.

Can’t tell you yet, exactly, because I’ve only used it to jack off so far. I probably won’t be busting out the Share with Penny - it’s too long, too thin. And honestly, I don’t know any girls who prefer to get fucked long rather than in girth; it’s that feeling of being stretched open that, in my experience, female-bodied folks want. If a cock is too long, it starts hitting against the cervix, which actually can be painful.

Long & thin is really great for anal play, though … hmm, ideas.

I’ve got a few more things coming from Babeland soon, I hope, which I’m excited to keep exploring. They are very queer- and gender-friendly, many of my friends have worked there in the past, their staff is really super smart and knowledgeable. They’ve gone through some changes in recent years, but they still have tons of great books, resources, and a sex-positive environment to explore sexuality, sex toys, gender, play, sensation. And yes, I know they’re sending me toys and all, but I’ve always adored them - when I moved to Seattle ten years ago their store was one of the first things I sought out. I credit them with much of my adult sexual awakening, and love the work they’re doing.

When Callie and I were upstate for that poetry competition, she brought up the possibility of perhaps maybe someday me getting a bigger cock.

Now, I love my cock, don’t get me wrong. It’s known as Mr. Bendy, because it is made of “flesh-like” cyberskin material and has a spine in it that means it can bend enough to pack with, but is still hard enough to fuck with. (This is actually a big problem with packing dildos. Either they’re too hard to pack, or too soft to fuck with. Go figure.) The cyberskin means that we ALWAYS have to use a condom, and we keep it really clean, but that doesn’t really bug me - I kind of like the action of rolling a condom on, it’s sexy, makes me feel boyish. If I call this cock something other than “my cock” in my head (rarely aloud), I’d call it Mr. Pink because, you guessed it, it’s pink. In fact, it only comes in a “flesh tone” (by which they mean caucasion/khaki/beige) or a baby pink, and Babeland has only ever had pink when I’ve seen it.(Remember how Callie & I broke my old cock once upon a time? Yeah, this is the one we broke; then I bought a replacement, same make & model.)

And hey, Callie loves that pink cock of mine. It is very decently sized, not too big but big enough, and I know how to work her, know the angles at which to move, the pressure, how deep to go, know the kind of give she has, the weight on my hips, all of that.

Penetration is actually somewhat painful for Callie, actually. This isn’t something that I fully understand (especially because she not only seems to very much enjoy it - and tells me how much she enjoys it - but she very explicitly asks for it), but she has definitely made it clear that it is “painful every time.”

I guess she has gotten used to it, though. And while I do have one that is slightly longer, that isn’t what she craves: she craves wider girth.

We’ve been talking about fisting a lot lately, and she has expressed desire to feel stretched, and full. And after talking about how she wants more of me, talking up my huge cock and how she wouldn’t even be sure if she could take it, we made a special trip to our friendly neighborhood Babeland, two weekends ago, and promptly bought Rodeo Rick.

She’s a Vixskin dildo, made to feel like cyberskin - squishy, fleshlike - but actually made of silicone, so it is boilable and sterilizable.
Awww yeah.

Trouble in paradise began when we realized that our friend Rick here is 2″ in girth, and my harness is not one of those smart ones where you can update the ring size, and Ms. Rick won’t fit.

Now, the harness is another essential tool here, aside from the cock. In fact, for the wearer, the penetrator, the harness is absolutely key - in my opinion/experience - to feeling the maximum amount of pleasure, and, ultimately, to being able to get off.

For example, my two-strap (jock-strap style) leather harness, though nice (and cost me a pretty penny), does not get me off because I don’t have enough stimulation on my clit.

My one-strap “travel harness,” as I’ve nicknamed it, because it is the smallest, simplest harness I’ve ever seen, basically just two rings, one in the front & one in back, held together with two lengths of nylon around the waist, and one length between the legs in a g-string style. No frills at all. This harness has been key to getting off while fucking. It hits exactly the right spots, the strap is narrow enough that it covers my clit perfectly and rubs just right with the pressure of in-and-out. This harness was really cheap, something around $25, and I would highly recommend it in every way. (It’s also fantastic for packing - sometimes a leather harness is much too bulky to have on under clothes.)

But neither of these harnesses has a changable ring, you know, with snaps around it so different size cock rings can be interchanged. Damnit.

My travel harness isn’t the best harness, anyway - it has D-ring clasps, meaning that instead of having like a belt-buckle style where the straps lock in place and don’t slip around, it gets looped back over-under itself, like one of those casual fabric summer belts. The D-ring clasps do sometimes loose some of the tension, which sometimes mean my precision slips. (There are probably better names for these things. I should learn them. Or at least illustrate with pictures. Perhaps I’ll add some from home, as I don’t want to go surfing Babeland at work.) I also don’t really like that it is nylon. I’m not big on my leather harness either, and I’ve actually had some friends recommend rubber because it’s so easy to clean and stays in really nice shape, but that seems so … impersonal, and plastic. Plus, the nylon seems kind of cheap. But! It took some work, some dedicated searching on Babeland, Good Vibes, Aslan Leather, JT’s Stockroom, and a few other places, but thank god for the internet, ’cause I found the perfect new harness.

Criteria:
- one-strap style, with thin straps that will hit my clit
- locking straps
- interchangable rings
- non-nylon material

Callie emailed me today with some news of another sex party coming up on the 31st, and a new baby-pink corset. I think Rick and I are going to have quite a good time.