Posts Tagged ‘in which Sinclair gets toppy with the blogosphere’

Biggest Sideshow Yet! Genderqueer Tantra! So Much To Do

May 9, 2011  |  miscellany  |  2 Comments

This month’s Sideshow: Queer Literary Carnival is the biggest yet! We have three poets, three comics, three guest judges, one musical guest, and one host who will be joining us on Tuesday—tomorrow night!—and telling dirty jokes and funny poems for your pleasure.

If you didn’t see Cheryl B.‘s previous reading series, Poetry vs Comedy Variety Hour, you’re in for a treat!

Join us at Sideshow on May 10th for a special revival of Cheryl B.’s previous reading series, Poetry vs Comedy Variety Hour! PVC is not a typical poetry slam nor a regular stand-up comedy show. PVC is a battle of wits and Rhymes where the stanzas and the stand-ups collide.

Performers include Kit Yan, Molly “Equality” Dykeman, Sinclair Sexsmith, Paul Case, Emma Willmann, and Jessica Halem. Celebrity guest judges include Shawn Hollenbach, Livia Scott, and Amanda Goad, Esquire. Hosted by Carolyn Castiglia, this special PvC features musical guest Leibya Rogers!

Sideshow: The Queer Literary Carnival: POETRY vs COMEDY
Hosted by Cheryl B. & Sinclair Sexsmith
Tuesday, May 10th
at The Phoenix
447 East 13th Street at Avenue A
Doors, 7:30pm. Reading, 8pm
Free! (We’ll pass the hat for the readers)

Now, that’s on Tuesday.

On Thursday, there is a very special Lesbian Sex Mafia monthly workshop, which features my tantra mentor.

Genderqueer Tantra with Alex Jade
Thursday, May 12 8:00pm
LGBT Community Center
208 W 13th St, New York, NY
RSVP on Facebook

Tantra is a school of thought and spiritual practice that allows us to explore the multi-dimensions of spiritual energy in our bodies. Though it often emphasizes the relationship between masculine and feminine, Genderqueer Tantra allows us to PLAY with masculine and feminine energies without getting caught up in rigid gender limitations. Join Tantra and SM practitioner Alex Jade for an interactive workshop that will introduce you to the basic Tantra concepts and invite you to deepen your sexual experiences, increase awareness of the body and mind using sensations from subtle to bold.

Alex Jade, MSW is an erotic educator, sacred intimate, psychotherapist, and student of Tantra. She is on the faculty of the Body Electric School and she has produced and taught independent workshops in Seattle for over 15 years. She has mastery in clothes-off hands-on experiential erotic education and the use of ritual as a healing tool. Alex’s specialties are gender exploration, classical Tantra, SM, and exploring with an open heart and mind.

This coming weekend, after these two (HUGE) events, I will be off in the mini-mountains of the Hudson Valley exploring some shadow through some bdsm and erotic energy play. I’m really thrilled to be doing another erotic energy retreat, and so glad it has come together. It is ever hard to get people to come out to events! Women especially, it seems.

I have more to say about that, and about a dozen other topics, but my brain is kind of fried with these events. They are so time consuming. More writing soon.

Reminder: Best Lesbian Erotica 2012 Submissions Are Due April 1

March 29, 2011  |  miscellany  |  No Comments

This is one of my favorite erotica series, not only because the 1997 version was one of the first books of lesbian erotica that I ever picked up, and because I’ve submitted to this anthology every year starting in 2006 (though I haven’t been included every year). I always pick it up, always, regardless of the table of contents or the guest judge, because it is a high quality collection that I always enjoy.

Next year, 2012, I’ve heard rumors that there is a special guest judge. I can’t tell you who, but I am excited.

If you’re an erotica writer, consider getting something together for the April 1 deadline! Specific guidelines for submission are below:

Kathleen Warnock is now accepting submissions for Best Lesbian Erotica 2012, to be published by Cleis Press in December, 2011.

Submission Guidelines:

  • Submit short stories, self-contained novel excerpts, other prose
  • Unpublished material will be considered
  • Previously published material will also be considered
  • Submit two hard copies of each submission (you may print double-sided).
  • Include a cover page with: Author’s Name, Pen Name (if applicable) Title of Submission(s), Address, Phone, and Email Address, and short (50-ish words) bio.
  • All submissions must be typed and double-spaced; number the pages.
  • Each submission should be a maximum of 5,000 words (list word count on title page).You may print double-sided.
  • You may submit up to 2 different pieces of work
  • No email submissions will be accepted, except in the circumstances detailed below; you can email queries to Kwarnockble (at) gmail.com
  • Manuscripts will not be returned, so please don’t send return envelopes.
  • We will consider stories that have been published in other themed anthologies.

E-mail submissions:
You may submit your story via email (as a Word document or PDF) under the following conditions:

  • You live outside of North America or Europe
  • The cost of postage would be prohibitive from your home country
  • The content of your submission may be illegal to send via postal mail in your home country

Submission Deadline:
Submissions will be accepted throughout the year. The final (postmark) deadline is April 1, 2011. All submissions will be responded to by the end of September. Early submissions are encouraged.

Mailing Information:
Send all submissions to:

Kathleen Warnock
31-64 21st St., #319
Long Island City, NY 11106
Attn: BLE2012

If mailing from the US, First Class mail is fine. If you require a confirmation other than the USPS Delivery Confirmation, please included a self-addressed stamped postcard (not an envelope). If mailing from Canada, Airmail or XpressPost USA are recommended.

Please note: April 1, 2011 is a postmark date. You don’t need to overnight it as long as it is postmarked by then. If you are unable to make the postmark date, please email to discuss the possibility of an extension.

Questions? Email the editor at kwarnockble (at) gmail.com.

Vote in AfterEllen’s Hot 100 & Increase Gender Diversity in Lesbian Pop Culture

April 27, 2010  |  miscellany  |  8 Comments

AfterEllen.com has opened up voting for its annual Hot 100 list, which is largely a response to the “top hot list” time of year, and to give “lesbian/bi women a way to express what, or who, we find attractive, since our voice is largely missing from mainstream, heterocentric pop culture.”

A noble goal, to be sure, especially since AfterEllen’s major realm is in fact mainstream pop culture. To add voice to what queer women find sexy is a great place to start.

Last year’s list (has it been a year already?), though, is part of what got my boxers in a twist and why I put together Top Hot Butches, which is a list of 100 genderqueer, androgynous, and butch folks. The AfterEllen list has so far been extremely feminine, white, under 40, and straight. Last year, AfterEllen launched some supplemental lists, which were: women of color, women over 40, and out women.

But still, no gender diversity.

Though there are a few notable folks (Katherine Moenig, Rachel Maddow, Tegan & Sara, arguably), the majority of the list is still completely feminine.

And coming from someone who works in gender diversity, and who interacts with many, many queer women, many of whom, I know for a fact, are specifically oriented toward masculinity in their sexuality and partnering, I think that is missing a huge segment of the queer world.

So head on over and nominate some of your favorite butches for that list, willya? Need some inspiration? Browse through the Top Hot Butches, see who catches your eye. Who knows, they might not make it onto the final cut. But at least it’ll be an increase in votes from last year, and maybe next year they’ll finally do a genderqueer supplemental list, at the very least.

Aaaaaaand insert the nice segue here:

Speaking of encouraging more gender diversity in the mainstream pop culture, especially dyke culture:

I wrote a piece for AfterEllen recently, called Sugarbutch Says: Butches on Television, about the gender representation on television in the recent past. I was aiming for it to be current, but I just had to include some L Word folks in there.

Clipped from: www.afterellen.com by clp.ly

 

I didn’t include Tasha, played by Rose Rollins, from The L Word, though perhaps I should have. I was focusing on the actors (or TV personalities, in the case of Rachel Maddow & Ellen Degeneres), not necessarily the character, and it’s pretty rare for a butch character to be played by a straight woman, though I suppose it’s been done (Chloe Sevigny in If These Walls Could Talk II, or Hilary Swank as trans man Brandon Teena).

I also didn’t include Sue Sylvester and/or Jane Lynch. She’s out, right? And she’s butch-ish—at least, she’s not feminine. I’m still enjoying Glee, despite it’s occasional insanity and bad writing, and she really makes the show. Sue, her character, is not out, though, and again, I was kind of focused on queer butches who were somewhat explicitly queer and fairly masculine in appearance.

But there is more to explore here—I guess it’s time for a follow-up article already!

If this piece goes over well, I may be writing more for AfterEllen, and I already have some notes about butches in films and butches as characters in novels.

So, do you like the article over there? Comment and let them know, will ya, so I can keep going, trying desperately to inject some gender diversity into lesbian pop culture?

Happy birthday, Kristen!

May 21, 2009  |  journal entries  |  24 Comments

Today is Kristen’s 26th birthday! She’s planning a very elaborate 5-course meal for some of her favorite people this weekend (she is quite the top in the kitchen, remember) and I get to play bartender, so I spent some time researching the appropriate wine pairings. The signature cocktail of the evening will be a dirty slut birthday girl gimlet. (It was a dirty dirty dirty martini, but since the cocktail hour is coming after dinner and before dessert, we decided the extra-spicy olives and pickles she likes in her martinis wouldn’t go that well with the almond birthday cake with sherry-lemon buttercream icing. So, gimlet. I’ll share the recipe if it turns out perfectly.)

I’ve got some secret plans for the weekend, too, which definitely includes birthday spankings, gifts, and a few other things …

vettriano
Game On by Jack Vettriano, one of my favorite artists

Happy birthday, baby. I’m so glad I get to celebrate this day with you, and so glad you’re with me. I’ve never had it so good, it just keeps building and building, getting better and better – I know how lucky I am, and I am so grateful. Hope this day is joyous in every way.

Wish her a happy birthday for me, willya? She is a huge part of why the smut writing has been so good lately, after all …

I Love LDN Girls too

January 3, 2009  |  miscellany  |  1 Comment

I Love London Girls has also released their 2009 Calendars, and this time there are three: the traditional I Love LDN Girls, the new I Love Film Girls, and the new I Love Drag.

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Protected: sex blogger calendar outtake

December 1, 2008  |  miscellany  |  Enter your password to view comments.

Have you purchased your calendar yet? Get 'em quick, they're going fast. Even if you aren't all that into the idea of a putting up a sex blogger calendar in your house or at your work, please just suck it up and buy one anyway. Show your support not only for this project (which was a huge labor of love, thank you Njoy, thank you Tess) but also support for Sex Work Awareness.

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if I had a red pen

August 12, 2008  |  essays, journal entries, miscellany  |  16 Comments

If I had a red pen that worked on internet web pages, I would go around and circle all the places where “Sugarbutch Chronicles” appears as “SugarButch Chronicles” or “Sugar Butch Chronicles.”

It’s a little thing, and it really doesn’t matter that much, what matters the most is that someone has seen this little space on the web of mine and likes it enough to link back to it in their own little space on the web. I’m always touched when I find Sugarbutch linked from a new place. So I’d never email somebody and be picky enough to say, “Hey, thanks for linking me, but will you change your capitalization?”

(I love how you can see the paper texture here, how the ink is just a little bit smeared. And that the word is “gender,” of course. So hot.)

But I always, always write this site name as “Sugarbutch,” so I’m not sure why people change it. The heading, the page title, the blog title, any comment I leave – it’s all one word. I admit, it’s a pet peeve of mine. I’m a grammarphile, after all. An English major. It’s not just the bad grammar that bugs me, but also the not calling things the way they want to be called, and lack of attention to detail.

Maybe other sugarbutches write the word differently and have different philosophies about why they capitalize or don’t capitalize the letter B. I don’t claim to have made up the term, but when I started using it, I’d never heard anyone else use it before me.

The way I see it, sugarbutch is a compound word. Part of why it is important that it is a compound word, why the B in butch is lowercase, is because the poetic meter of the phrase is a dactyl: the emphasis, when said, is on the first of the three syllables: SU-gar-butch CHRO-ni-cles. Adding a capital B gives the impression that it should be cretic: SU-gar-BUTCH CHRON-i-CLES, or, worse yet, that the “sugar” and the “butch” are separated completely: SU-gar BUTCH.

There’s a reason for the lowercase b, is what I’m saying.

(Thanks to the Movie Screenshot blog for the stills from Secretary.)

The red pen scenes always remind me of watching the film Secretary with The Ex. After she saw it for the first time, a few weeks later – it may’ve been our anniversary, or some such event, because I was definitely dressed up, and had brought flowers – she gave me two small gifts: one was very nicely wrapped small box, and in it was chewed up gum and pencil shavings. The other was a red Sharpie with ribbons tied around it.

Just remembering that moment where I opened the box makes something stir in my pelvis, some sort of heat of power. Sometimes she really knew how to play with me, how to get me going. It was so exciting, in the beginning.

When I opened these gifts I was in her office – she was the president of the queer student government group on my college campus, of course she was – and I locked her door, punished her, and fucked her on her desk long enough for us both to miss our next classes.

In the aftermath, we were tidying up, laughing, trying to listen to see how many people were in the adjoining lounge to figure out whether or not they knew we were in the office, and she took my hand and said, “Since I moved into this office I wanted to be fucked on this desk … thank you.”

One of my favorite moments of sex with her. Jeez, it’s so good in the honeymoon phase, isn’t it?

psst … post script, on eye candy

August 7, 2008  |  miscellany  |  13 Comments

Part of the deal of me posting eye candy is that you, as readers and appreciators of the butch/femme dynamic, which I assume you probably are if you are visiting this site, are required to comment about how hot the butch is.

Hey, it’s hard to be objectified as “eye candy.” It’s hard to be judged purely on sexiness and looks and hotness and female masculinity appeal. So we must give these butches lotsa love.

And Dani is particularly hot. See what I’m getting at? There should really be more than two comments on that post.

I’m not usually toppy or controlling about comments, but part of the entire point of posting photos of butches is to celebrate female masculinity, especially in the face of a community that often villifies butches with nothing short of blame for the entire oppression of women, feminists, lesbians, dykes, etc. Cause that’s all our faults, you know. If we were only a little more of a “real woman” (read: conforming to our prescribed societal gender role) we wouldn’t be so oppressed.

So please, spoil the eye candy, will ya?

I’ve been thinking lately about how to do an equivalent of femme eye candy series. It might be called something like “femme not straight,” but I’m not exactly sure how to do that without it becoming “photos of pretty girls” which, though that’s awesome, is I think a cheap blog trick. Any interest or ideas?

Speaking of eye candy, I’ve got some good ones coming up. A filmmaker, and a butch on a motorcycle, great photos both. Keep sending ‘em in, or tag ‘em sugarbutch on flickr.