Posts Tagged ‘I left my heart in …’

Take a Tour of Kink.com in San Francisco

November 28, 2011  |  reviews  |  2 Comments

Back in August, when I was in San Francisco for the Butch Voices National Conference, I took an afternoon tour of Kink.com and it was rad. I dragged along two butch buddies, BB Rydell (who has a piece in my forthcoming anthology Say Please!) and Amy Butcher (who has a piece in Best Lesbian Erotica 2012, and with whom I’m teaching Owning Your Birthday Suit on December 5th).

We were excited.

The armory building that kink.com occupies is HUGE and incredible! The most amazing part of seeing the inside of the kink.com empire, aside from actually standing in all those places where all those beautifully hot scenes are made, was finally understanding all the work that goes into making the place look so old, dirty, and distressed. That’s all done by their art department—as they said, you could actually lick the walls, because everything gets sterilized after every scene. It doesn’t look like it, but all the rust and wear is all an elaborate paint job. Check it out:

I particularly liked the Upper Floor, which looks like an upscale club and is on a live feed 24/7. You can probably tell as I took about a dozen photos up there, more than the other rooms. I want one of those toy cabinets! And maybe a bar and poker table, too, while I’m at it.

We had a really excellent time seeing behind the scenes and asking questions about what goes on at kink.com. My impression from all the models and porn stars I’ve talked to about it is that kink.com is really ethical and treats their folks really well. I certainly got that impression from the tour and meeting some of the staff.

A tour gift certificate might be the perfect thing for that person on your holiday list, hmm?

Cock Confidence, Owning Your Birthday Suit, & More Workshops in the Bay Area Next Week

August 12, 2011  |  miscellany  |  6 Comments

I’m just starting to feel like I’ve returned from the Pulse retreat, finally, in body, mind, emotional landscape, and spirit, when now I am leaving again on Tuesday for the Butch Voices conference in Oakland, and for some surrounding events, like a spoken word set in Oakland on Sunday, August 21st. I mentioned that it’s going to be a busy August here at the Sugarbutch Empire!

I’m also doing some new workshops in September at Dark Odyssey Summer Camp, which I’m really excited about.

Cock Confidence

At Camouflage, Santa Cruz, CA, August 16, 8pm
At Good Vibrations, San Francisco, CA, August 17, 6:30pm
At Butch Voices Conference, Oakland, CA, Date TBA (August 18-21)
At Dark Odyssey Summer Camp, Date TBA (Sept 14-19)

Many of us have experience with strapping on, packing, and playing, but there are lots of new products out there on the market that might be exciting and that you haven’t encountered yet. Writer and sex educator Sinclair Sexsmith talk about what cocks are good for packing, what options are out there for pack-and-play, which harnesses are the most loved, and which to avoid. Plus, she’ll delve into some cock confidence, getting into the psychology of penetration, and discussing what it’s like to shoot from the hip. Come get the nuts and bolts of strapping it on and fucking. You’ll learn about positions and lube, how different products work, what “cock confidence” means, and the psychology behind strapping on and playing with a cock with a partner, or with oneself.

Owning Your Birthday Suit: Embodiment for Masculine of Center Folks

Taught with Amy Butcher
At Butch Voices Conference, Oakland, CA, Date TBA (August 18-21)

Masculine of center folks often find it hard to be present in our bodies, to feel the powerful connection between genitals, heart, and mind. Explore a variety of playful experiential exercises to increase embodiment while respecting stone sexualities and everyone’s boundaries. Learn some simple tools to feel erotic energy, build connection to your desires, and feel more alive and at home in your body. Experience the taboo power of sharing this exploration within community.

Queering Power Dynamics: D/s, Age Play, and More

At Dark Odyssey Summer Camp, Date TBA (Sept 14-19)

Top, bottom, switch, and everything in between: many of us like to explore what it’s like to give up or take power in our sex play. Some of us even like to play with psychological domination and submission. Add a gendered or age component, and the power distance index (PDI) increases. So what happens if we severely increase the power distance, through 24/7 role play or domination and submission? What happens when we incorporate identities like “Daddy” from the leather community? What could other age play roles of bigs and littles, Daddies and Mommies, boys and bois and girls and grrrls, have to offer us as we seek deeper and more fulfilling sex explorations? This advanced kink workshop explores power, gender, and age play in a queer context, where we’ll discuss bringing a power exchange relationship of any sort from the bedroom into a 24/7 lifestyle, what the benefits are for both, and how to go about navigating long term fulfillment for all parties within the relationship.

Steamy: How To Write About Sex

At Dark Odyssey Summer Camp, Date TBA (Sept 14-19)

To write about sex well you need the boldness to command and describe the dirty and oh so delicious acts we humans explore, and the basic writing skills of plot, setting, and character. In this pen-to-paper writing workshop we’ll look at some examples of extremely successful and unsuccessful erotica, steamy love letters for your sweetheart, how to step up your blog to the next level, where to submit your work for publication in the erotica world, and some quick basics for editing your work. Bring a paper and writing utensil, we will be doing writing exercises.

Talk Dirtier: How to Let Your Tongue Go

At Dark Odyssey Summer Camp, Date TBA (Sept 14-19)

Talking dirty in the bedroom can be terrifying at first, but once you unlock your tongue, you’ll find yourself saying all sorts of delicious things! Come to this workshop and we’ll figure out what’s tying our tongues in the first place, what’s holding us back from being more free with our language in the bedroom, and what the heck we should say to enhance our sex and intensity our sensation. The brain is the biggest sex organ, after all, and the more we can turn on our minds, the better our experiences will be.

In Addition …

I’m booking fall travel to colleges, community centers, and nearby sex toy stores now!

I have travel plans to Seattle in November, and I’m hoping to get to Chicago, Milwaukee, DC, Philadelphia, Boston, Atlanta, and Raleigh/Durham. If you’re in one of those places, I’d love to chat with you about helping to make a workshop happen.

My full list of offered workshops is online, and you can also download a PDF of extended descriptions or a press kit on mrsexsmith.com.

Get in touch with me, mrsexsmith (at) gmail.com, if you’d like to book a workshop or want more information about my rates and fees, or about helping me get to your town. You can also contact my booking company, PhinLi, at [email protected]