“Oh fuck -
God – yes – fucking hell -
holy shit – oh god – god -
oh fuck – oh god – oh – yes -
oh fuck -
holy shit … “
“You’ve got quite a mouth on you, Mr. Sexsmith.”
Lately it seems I have had a lot of these moments when I get a screenshot of what I’m doing loaded in my head, and I think, holy shit. This is my life.Thursday night, it was that gorgeous blonde, on top of me, straddling my cock, grinding against me, hands in her hair, head turned to one side mouth open eyes shut, moaning, my hands on her hips – and I nearly laughed.
“You better not be laughing with a naked lady in the room,” she gave me a look like she was going to smack me, but her eyes were playful.
I tried to explain. This is my life, I said. I think she got it.
Friday, it was out with an amazing group of new friends, at a vegan cafe with prosecco, at a stunning concert with New York’s skyline in the background, then at the local watering hole (aka dyke bar) where I actually ran into people I know – that doesn’t ever happen to me! I was out on the town with (dare I name it) my community, sitting around a picnic table with cider and beer and bourbon, talking about sex and strapons and relationships and how to invite what you want into your life and topping and bottoming and delivering and love and romance and doting upon and, of course, gender …
It is the first time in a long time, probably many years, that I have heard last call at a bar. We were all so excited to be connecting, communicating friends that we didn’t want to leave.
Lucky for us, there is a rooftop barbecue already planned for this afternoon.
I gotta say, it is really fucken great to be me right now. And I am so, so grateful.
Subject: hi, this is me emailing you
day after. my impulse is to be poetic and make reference to the willow tree while walking home, the curve of your hip, the way our bodies fit against each other in quiet moments, the way you move, smell, taste.
but then that sounds all dramatic.
so I’ll just say, I had a great night with you. there is still more I want to know. let’s do it again.