Archive for November, 2010

Kristen’s Burlesque Debut

November 16, 2010  |  miscellany  |  No Comments

Remember the Butch Burlesque that happened at Dixon Place a few months back? Well, the instructor from that series did a series for the more feminine-id

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entified folks, goddess burlesque, and Kristen decided to take part. Take her clothes off? In public? And have people admire her sexiness? Sure why not!

So she’s making her debut this weekend, Saturday November 20th at 9:30pm here in New York City, as Lavender Menace (look it up if you don’t get the reference). Come!

Crones, Ducks & Babes
Presented by Dixon Place & Victoria Libertore

Saturday, November 20th at 9:30 p.m.
Dixon Place
161 Chrystie Street (btn Rivington & Delancey)
$15/$12 (students & seniors)
GET TIX HERE

An evening of variety, merriment & surprise hosted by Howling Vic (as her alter ego Liza). Enjoy music, burlesque, clowns and free gifts! And the topper is five of Howling Vic’s students are making their burlesque debut! Audiences have said their faces hurt from laughing so hard!

Performers: Jessy Carolina & The Hot Mess 6 piece Old Time Jazz Band, James & JF: Emily James & Ishah Janssen-Faith and making their debut: Aqua Vulva, Crystal Balls, Lavender Menace, Sunshine Bloomfade and Priestess Moon Feather.

Manipulated by Victoria Libertore

Saving & Changing Lives: Scarleteen’s Activism

November 15, 2010  |  essays  |  No Comments

So this month, Scarleteen has had a Fund Raiser and Blog Carnival coordinated by AAG going ’round the sex blogs. Dozens of writers and bloggers and sex-positive forward thinking folks took part, just take a look at the list here

You probably already know about Scarleteen. I certainly mention that site frequently here. Here’s the description:

Scarleteen has been the premier online sexuality resource for young people worldwide since 1998, and has the longest tenure of any sex education resource for young people online. We have consistently provided free, inclusive, comprehensive and positive sex education, information and one-on-one support to millions, and have never shied away from discussing sexuality as more than merely posing potential risks, but as posing potential benefits, something rarely seen in young adult sex education. We built the online model for teen and young adult sex education and have never stopped working hard to sustain, refine and expand it.

Sometimes I feel like I’m preaching to the choir when I say that teen sex education is important, and that beyond that reliable information about sex available for anyone and everyone on the internet is also important. I go there frequently when I need to look up the details of STIs, for example. It’s a great resource for all kinds of things, and the testimonials from teens and folks who have been users and contributors to the site for years are very moving. They have a whole community, people talking to each other and taking care of each other and sending love and information to each other honestly and openly. That kind of interaction and information is invaluable.

In 2009 and 2010, Scarleteen has had around 1 million overall hits to the site each day from an average of 25,000 unique users daily. And you know, I don’t think it’s that much of a stretch to say that sites like this, with frank and real and honest and non-judgmental resources about sexuality, kink, sexual orientation, gender identity, and relationships, can and have had real impact on the complicated and sometimes life-threatening teenage years of folks with marginalized genders and sexualities. Sex education saves lives, at best, and absolutely changes lives.

I’m closing out the blog carnival today, along with pieces by Violet Blue on Tiny Nibbles and Heather Corinna on Scarleteen, with the end of the call for financial support for Scarleteen.

Scarleteen is very undersupported financially. We always need more financial support and I would very much appreciate having yours. I think we do a fantastic, important job, think we have for many years, and I intend to do all I can for us to keep doing that job for many more to come so we can remain a place young people know they can come back to, and don’t have to worry about passing in the night when a media or cultural tide shifts. I think Scarleteen and all that happens at Scarleteen is very worthy of being supported and sustained. To make that happen, we need more than just my own stubborn and dogged commitment and that of our volunteers: it also takes some dollars. (Quoted from Heather’s post on Scarleteen.)

Thanks to some generous donors, up to $2,000 in donations will now be matched for donations made from today until Saturday the 20th. If you’ve got an extra few bucks, now’s the time to toss ‘em toward an organization that does some important work.

Early to Bed in Chicago

November 15, 2010  |  reviews  |  1 Comment

I’m adding a new affiliate to Sugarbutch this week: the Chicago-based sex toy store Early to Bed. If you live in Chicago you probably know about it already (if you don’t, now you do! Go visit), but even if you don’t live there you may have seen them online. They have a wonderful, simple site with fantastic products that anybody can order.

From the owner, Searah: “Many years ago while shopping for sex toys at a store filled with tacky blow-up dolls, raunchy gag gifts and walls of over-priced vibrators, I asked the sales person a simple question about lube. The question was met with a blank stare while she grabbed what was closest and said “um… ah…I think this one is good…?”. It wasn’t good at all and it was at that moment that my mission became clear: Chicago needed a sex shop with smart staff people, fair prices and a warm, women-friendly environment. I wanted a place where anyone could ask a reasonable question about sexuality and not be met with a snicker or black stare. … I opened Chicago’s first women-owned, women-oriented, boy-friendly, queer and trans-positive sex shop. We have worked hard to support the local women’s and queer communities and will continue to do so in the future. With our ongoing workshops and outreach events, we are striving to provide a place where people can come to learn more about sex and themselves. It is my hope that Early to Bed will be known as not only a retail store, but as a safe space to explore sexuality and foster a sex-positive community.”

In addition, they recently launched Early to Rise, their male-focused site:

Ever since our women-oriented sister store, Early to Bed, opened in 2001, one of the most frequent jokes made by customers has been “hey, you should have another store for men called Early to Rise next door.” For years we just chuckled at the notion, as there were plenty of sex shops designed for men and we were women who knew much more about women’s toys, bodies and sexual needs. Besides, with the majority of the shoppers in our store being female, it just didn’t seem necessary.

Fast forward eight years and our male clientele has grown and grown. Apparently, there are just as many men interested in a sex-positive shopping experience as there are women. With Early to Rise we are hoping to create a sex-positive site with good sex information, honest reviews of male-oriented sex toys and advice for men, written by men. Additionally, we have selected some of the finest and best-loved adult toys designed for men to sell in our online shop.

I love what Early to Bed is doing, and I’m excited to support them through my work. Check ‘em out.

Sugarbutch Star Chapbooks Are Almost Sold Out—Want One?

November 14, 2010  |  miscellany  |  No Comments

Three summers ago, I started a project called the Sugarbutch Star. Maybe you remember: I asked folks for submissions for story ideas, outlines of erotic encounters with characters, plot, and setting, and then I would write up the story.

There were a couple reasons I did this. I wanted to deepen my writing, I wanted to continue writing erotic fiction, and I found that I could write variations on a theme that someone else gave me much easier than I could come up with my own scenarios. I was figuring out that that’s the kind of top I was, too—that when someone asked me to do a couple things, like, say, finger them and kiss them for a while, take their clothes off, throw them on the bed and fuck them until they came, that it was no problem for me to follow their requests, with variations and detail, in a way that was toppy and dominant. It was harder for me when I’d sleep with girls (or write characters, even) where anything was an option and I could do whatever I wanted. Sometimes I would freeze up. Not because I didn’t want to do anything, but because there were so many options, where do I even start?

I didn’t expect it, but these stories helped with that so much. Because the story content was someone else’s fantasy, because it was not from my own brain, even if it lined up with my desires, I didn’t feel guilty or shy about going for it all the way and really bringing all I had to that person’s idea for the erotic scene.

I didn’t even realize that I did feel shy or guilty about my desires up until doing this project, and once I realized that, it was much easier to notice and breathe through and decide whether I was going to let the guilt or shyness stop me, or not. It changed the way I top. It changed the way I write erotic stories.

And there were so many good scenarios that I decided to write up five “honorable mention” stories as short-shorts, which was great practice for me, too, because I noticed sometimes that my long stories took so long to finish. In addition, I wrote up five “finalists.” Then, once all ten stories were written and published here on Sugarbutch, I asked readers to vote for their favorite, and the person who submitted that scenario was henceforth known as a Sugarbutch Star.

So, these are the stories from the first year:

And I made them into a chapbook. I did two printings of this chapbook, each editions of 100, and I’m not planning to do another printing. I have about a dozen left, and I’m selling them for $10 each which includes shipping anywhere in the US (if you’re outside the US, I may ask you to send a couple more bucks to cover shipping, depending on the cost, but I’m glad to send it to you).

Want one? Email me, and if you’re in the first 12, I will reserve a copy for you and send you further details (the easiest way for me is to accept payment via Paypal).

I did the Sugarbutch Star project for a second year, too, and I decided I would only pick five stories as finalists, no matter how good all the submissions were. These were what I finished for the second year:

I started the fifth story, but never finished it. I still think I might, but maybe it’s time to let that go. (It’s just such a good story! Or it would be, if I could ever finish it.)

So here it is folks … last call for the Sugarbutch Star Chapbooks.

Protected: Responsibilities to Ourselves and Others

November 14, 2010  |  journal entries  |  Enter your password to view comments.

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Cher Thursday

November 11, 2010  |  reviews  |  3 Comments

So, sometimes I get random things offered to me by promotional companies. Most of the time I just hit delete and whatever. But this time … well … I thought that a certain buddy of mine would be oh so appreciative of something like this in their DVD collection, so I made a little request, started some rumors, and waited.

And then …

The pleasure is mine, certainly.


Cher: The Film Collection: Timed to the release of Burlesque, this 6-film collection includes: Good Times, Chastity, Silkwood, Moonstruck, Mermaids, and Tea with Mussolini. Arrives on DVD November 2, 2010.

CHER: THE FILM COLLECTION FAST FACTS:

Street Date: November 2, 2010
Pricing: $49.98 (Canada: $59.98)
Rating: Good Times / NR
Chastity / R
Silkwood / R
Moonstruck / PG
Mermaids / PG-13
Tea With Mussolini / PG
Language: Dubbed: English & French / Subtitled: English, French & Spanish

Theatrical Aspect Ratio: Fullscreen / Widescreen
Total Run Time: 634 minutes

CHER: THE FILM COLLECTION SYNOPSES … Read More

What’s Happening in November

November 10, 2010  |  miscellany  |  7 Comments

I have a whole bunch of events coming up in November! So many, in fact, that I haven’t even had time to post about them yet. I try to keep them updated over at my mrsexsmith.com/appearances page, even when I don’t post about them here.

Strap-On 101 Workshop
Thursday, November 11th, 2010
Fascinations, Tuscon, AZ

Cock Confidence & Strapping It On
Monday, November 15th, 2010, 9pm
Conversio Virium, BDSM Student Group
302 Hamilton
Columbia University
New York City

Radical & Responsible Gender
Wednesday, November 17th, 2010
Smith College
Northampton, MA
7:30-9pm

Radical & Responsible Gender
Thursday, November 18th, 2010
6 – 8 pm
Kimmel Center, 9th floor, room 905
60 Washington Square South
NYU, New York City

All of these are open to the public, as far as I know. See you there, perhaps.

Don’t Forget! Big Sideshow Next Week in NYC

November 4, 2010  |  miscellany  |  1 Comment


November’s Dangerous Mammals Tour
at Sideshow: The Queer Literary Carnival
Hosted by Cheryl B. & Sinclair Sexsmith
with S. Bear Bergman, Ivan E. Coyote, Jessica Halem, and Tania Katan
Find out more about the readers!
Tuesday, November 9th @ The Phoenix
447 East 13th Street @ Avenue A
East Village, New York City
Doors, 7:30pm. Reading, 8pm
Free! (We’ll pass the hat for the readers)
RSVP on Facebook!