password protection

If you’d like to be included on the password email list, leave a comment with your email (and blog URL, if you have one) and I will update you with the password when I write a protected post.

I’ve written a few password-protected posts lately, mostly they are private journaling about my own process and thoughts, which is why they aren’t public.They are not some secret smut stories, or half-naked Thursday photos, though they may be, in the future.

I’m sure y’all know that I’m happy to reveal quite a lot about myself, though sometimes my own process feels not only self-indulgent but, occasionally, too intimate for the general internet public. Especially as this little writing project has gotten bigger and bigger, I seek a little more privacy on occasion.

But, on the other hand, personal self-reflection and processing is precisely why I started this writing project almost two years ago, and I gain such tremendous insight through writing out my process and my thoughts, as well as through the useful, constructive, responsive, and supportive comments. Sometimes readers have such insight into what’s up, and I so appreciate that feedback and conversation. Other times, readers tell me they are going exactly through the same thing, or that their girlfriends are just like me, and I find so much value in the sharing of our stories, in the places we are similar.

I don’t want to entirely lose the ability to write through my process here, but I had to do it slightly differently now that this site has grown. Hence, password protection.

Leave a comment if you’d like to be included on the mailing list to receive passwords in the future.

Published by Sinclair Sexsmith

Sinclair Sexsmith is a genderqueer kinky butch writer who teaches and performs, specializing in sexualities, genders, and relationships. They've written at since 2006, recognized numerous places as one of the Top Sex Blogs. Sinclair's gender theory and queer erotica is widely published in anthologies like Take Me There: Trans and Genderqueer Erotica, and online at Feministing, Autostraddle, AfterEllen, and more; they are the editor of Best Lesbian Erotica 2012 and Say Please: Lesbian BDSM Erotica, both published by Cleis Press. Sweet & Rough: Sixteen Stories of Queer Smut, Sinclair's first book of short erotic stories, was published in 2014. They use the pronouns they, them, theirs, themself, and live in Oakland, CA with their boy.

355 thoughts on “password protection”

  1. kim says:

    me too please! and ditto to the sentiment.

  2. LJ says:

    you always make me blush, so I think it's your duty to include me on your password list.

  3. Calliope says:

    I’d love to be on the password protected list; I’ve been lurking here for a while and your blog is hands down my favorite blog that I read, and I read a few :-)

  4. stchick says:

    I so need to be included on this password list, I am so addicted to your blog.

  5. Ezeesd says:

    Love the blog, I am sooooo glad I found it. I am starting over after being in a 10+ year relationship with a wonderful woman I adored. I tried to make it work but she didn't get me and never will. So, your blog has been a wonderful inspiration to me as I re-invent myself. I would like to be included on the password list if possible. Thank you very much.

  6. green-eyed girl says:
  7. Bea says:

    I'd love to be included on the list, if that's okay. :) I'm a fairly new reader, but your blog is super awesome.

  8. Dev says:

    Please? :-)

  9. Michelle says:

    Please, if you would.

  10. Artsy Amy says:

    please include me. I heart reading your site after my loooonnggg days chasing after sweet kiddies at private school. It helps me to remember I am not just defined by one thing.

  11. susu says:

    Hook a girl up. Thanks you are

    awesome! And thanks for inspiring Belle to start a blog!

  12. Onion says:

    So much for lurking…


  13. Chris H says:

    Can I have a password, please? I know of no one else who can make me so hot by writing about collar stays.

  14. Meridith says:

    I’d love to be included. Though our blogs don’t have much in common, our thoughts do. I’d like to keep reading yours.

  15. sweet says:


  16. E.D says:

    count me in please. :)

  17. Molly says:


  18. Nulaanne says:

    I would love to have a pass word. I enjoy reading what you write.

  19. Djoy says:

    Would be lovely to get extra access to your private words. I feel this whole blog already is such a gift and I'm grateful to read this dialogue. I have much respect that you share so openly. Blessings and joy, D.

  20. CC says:

    pretty please? (bats eyelashes)

  21. black and blue says:


  22. Leni says:


  23. Dosia says:

    If you wouldn't mind…this blog rocks!

  24. victor/victoria says:

    yes please. your blog always make me think (among other things).

  25. conquest says:

    Yes please! I'm such a lurker but your blog is so amazing! I've been raving about you to my friends.

  26. Joy says:

    I'd be honored to have access. (But I will not be offended if you decide against it.)

  27. Emma says:

    I'd love to be on the list, please.

  28. Ivy says:
  29. alisha says:
  30. Sarah says:

    Would love the secret password – exciting!

  31. Katerina says:

    I'd love the password!

  32. M. Monkey says:

    I, too, would very much like the password. :)

  33. Maria says:


  34. Lisa says:

    Love your blog, can't believe you have dragged me from my lurkerdome, but I can't resist, too curious about password protected posts.

  35. Marcelle Manhattan says:

    Absolutely. This blog was my discovery of the week. Really well-written and intelligent.

  36. kim says:

    I personally like all of your writing, smut and personal musings. I never expected the password protected area to include the sexual arena, as that's what we've always counted on when we read the fabulous sinclair sexsmith. I feel special to be included in the inner thoughts and reflections, as they all speak to your faithful readers.

    We all live, love, and need to ponder about it all, and count on your ponderings to relate to, reflect on, and identify with…

    so never edit yourself, and if you need to protect yourself in the process in this virtual world, do so my dear


  37. becky says:
  38. Zoe says:

    I would love to be included. Your reflections challenge and inspire me. I don't have a blog, but I'd be willing to give you my realname email address for collateral :)

  39. devon says:

    Thanks for asking, and yes, please, absolutely. Love your posts; reading them is like receiving little writing gifts. =)

  40. Eva says:

    The password lists grows…and I always enjoy your writing and stories and rants so please add me to the list. Thanks!

  41. Batini says:

    Sinclair, I would be so grateful to be included on your personal thoughts. A year and a half ago, I gave up straight life for bliss with a beautiful butch woman, and your ideas about gender and more have already been so helpful to me (been reading about 2 weeks). I don't want to miss a word.

  42. Unnur María says:

    I love your writing, both for the smut and the personal thoughts you process here. I would be grateful for a chance to read more. :)

  43. Ada says:

    hi sinclair your thought processes and writing on gender/ identity strike chords with me from time to time (very often, in fact) and i'd love to be in on the list :) thanks

  44. Alyson says:

    I really enjoy reading your blog and would like to read all of your entries. I think (and talk) about gender and sexuality a lot and am always interested in your thoughts! Thanks.

  45. Joye says:

    Thanks in advance!

  46. missmonkey says:

    Still thinking over your post (about a week after reading it) re: butch/femme dynamics as it would apply to me, a newly-out Latina who is trying to get away from the overt femininity demanded by my ethnicity. I wonder if I will ever choose to be feminine again or if I will embrace the masculine, as you have. Please keep writing. Your posts are incredibly thought-provoking.

    [Thank you! Keep in mind of course that there are many, many different parts of the gender galaxy, and you certainly don't have to be one-or-the-other in part of the masculine/feminine binary. Obviously I've got a bit of a binary-gender-fetish, but that's just me, that's certainly not everyone. And, in fact, I'm definitely in the minority when it comes to the dyke communities. // My advice (not that you asked for it) is to play with it, try it on, dress up, do what feels good, and let it be fluid, because it might change at any time. The experimenting can be fun! People will probably give you shit about it, but fuck them. // Oh, & one more thing – this makes me think of this quote I have on my fridge: "Believe nothing, no matter who said it, not even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." (I believe that's attributed to the Buddha.) — ss]

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